Schooled: 2000-Something: Academic Wars
by patrickmgaddis
Summary: Jeff is upset when C.B. is given the position of the new Academic Coach, so he decides to create his own team. An all-out academic war breaks out within the hallways of William Penn. Meanwhile, Lainey and Coach Mellor help Logan ask his crush to the school dance.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

_"It was August 22, 2000-something. The Academic Team was just getting started for the year, but the coach quit because of some falling out. Apparently she hated the kids. So, being a licensed Academic coach, I was more than happy to volunteer. However, on my way to Glascott's office, I ran into another eager teacher."_

"Hey, Jeff," C.B. said outside of Glascott's office. "What's up?"

"I'm volunteering to be the Academic coach," Jeff replied.

"No need to do that," C.B. said. "I will be volunteering."

"I actually really want to do it," Jeff said.

"I've been wanting it for years," C.B. said.

"I'm a licensed Academic coach," Jeff said.

"So am I," C.B. said.

"Look," Jeff said. "You already sponsor seven clubs. Please let me have this one."

"No," C.B. said.

"C.B.," Jeff said. "I'm the only teacher who doesn't sponsor a club. I really want this."

"I want it more," C.B. said.

"No," Jeff said. "I want it more."

"I want it more!" C.B. shouted louder.

"No!" Jeff shouted. "I want it more!"

"I deserve it!" C.B. shouted.

"For a hip teacher, you're sure being a jerk!" Jeff shouted.

"This is something I've wanted since the 90's!" C.B. shouted. "Plus, you can't just waltz into this school and ask to sponsor a club!"

"Yes I can, I think!" Jeff shouted.

Principal Glascott walked out of the office.

"You two!" Glascott shouted. "My office, now!"

_"C.B. and I had a mature conversation with Principal Glascott."_

"I should be the new Academic coach!" C.B. shouted. "You know I have all the qualifications!"

"Yes I do," Glascott said.

"I have the qualifications!" Jeff shouted. "And he already has seven clubs! I just want one!"

"Jeff," Glascott said. "C.B. really has wanted this for a long time. We have several other clubs that need sponsors."

"But I want this one!" Jeff shouted.

"I'm sorry," Glascott said. "But I'm going to have to go with C.B."

_"I was completely mature about it."_

Jeff smiled, quietly walked out of the school, and got into his car. After he shut the door, he screamed.

"It's not fair!" Jeff shouted. "He has seven clubs! Seven other clubs! It's not fair!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_"While I was pretending to be mature about C.B. becoming the coach of the Academic Team, Lainey and Coach Mellor were hard at work transforming the gym into the perfect venue for the school dance."_

"How did I get suckered into doing this?" Coach Mellor asked.

"You lost the coin toss," Lainey said. "Don't complain."

Lainey and Coach Mellor looked over to see Logan sitting on the bleachers staring at Ephram and his friend, Emily, who were helping to set up for the dance.

"Look at that," Coach Mellor said. "The young man obviously has a crush."

"I say we help him," Lainey said.

Lainey and Coach Mellor walked over and sat beside Logan.

"Hey there," Coach Mellor said.

"We know you have a crush," Lainey said.

"It's that obvious?" Logan asked.

"I mean, you're sitting here and checking her out," Coach Mellor said.

"Her?" Logan asked.

"We know you like Emily," Lainey said.

"I have a crush," Logan said. "But it's not on Emily."

Lainey looked over and realized he meant Ephram.

"Oh," Lainey said.

"Who does he have the crush on?" Coach Mellor asked, not getting it.

Lainey whispered in Coach Mellor's ear.

"Really?" Coach Mellor asked in a surprised tone.

Coach Mellor looked over at Ephram and then at Logan.

"Huh," Coach Mellor said. "I can see it."

"I like him," Logan said. "And I think he likes me too. But I'm scared."

"I think you should ask him to the dance," Lainey said.

"But what if he rejects me?" Logan asked. "And what if I get made fun of? No one knows that I'm… That I'm… That I'm gay."

"It's okay to be scared," Lainey said. "But do you really want to keep it a secret?"

"I shouldn't have told you anything," Logan said.

Logan got up and walked off. Lainey looked at Coach Mellor.

"We have got to help him," Lainey said.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_"After school, I sat at my desk going over a list of potential clubs." _

"Really?" Jeff asked. "The Cake Tasting Club?"

C.B. walked into the classroom.

"How's the club search going, Bro?" C.B. asked.

"Well, I might sponsor the Cake Eating Club," Jeff replied.

"I'm already sponsoring that," C.B. said.

"Are you kidding me?!" Jeff shouted.

Jeff stormed out of his classroom.

_"I needed to cheer myself up, so I went to a chicken wing restaurant."_

Jeff sat at a table in a restaurant eating chicken wings. A waitress walked up to him.

"Anything else?" the waitress asked.

"More wings please," Jeff said. "This time I want honey wings."

"This is your fifth order of wings," the waitress said.

"Wings are the only good thing in my life right now," Jeff replied.

"I know you're upset about not being the Academic coach," the waitress said.

"How do you?" Jeff asked.

"You keep shouting 'Take that C.B.! I deserve to be Academic coach!' between bites," the waitress replied.

"Oh," Jeff said.

"Why don't you create your own Academic Team?" the waitress asked.

"You're right," Jeff said. "I can create my own Academic Team! Thanks, Cheryl!"

"My name is Emily," the waitress said.

"As soon as I get my honey wings, I'm going to gather students for my team!" Jeff cheered.

_"Taking Emily's advice, I went to where most of the students hung out after school."_

Jeff arrived at the food court at the mall to see several groups of middle and high school students. He then stood in the middle of the food court.

"Attention, William Penn students!" Jeff shouted. "I'm creating my own Academic Team! C.B. already has seven clubs!"

A male middle school student raised his hand.

"Yes, Josh?" Jeff asked.

"Actually, it's 17," Josh said.

"Okay," Jeff said. "17 clubs! Anyway, I'm taking a stand and creating my own! I need at least two people and at most, ten people. I don't care if you're in middle or high school. As long as you go to William Penn, I want you on the team!"

"I shall join!" Josh chanted, walking over to Jeff.

"I shall join too!" a female high school student chanted.

"And me!" a female middle school student chanted.

_"It was only three members, but I had my Academic Team."_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

_"While I was getting my Academic Team in order, Lainey and Coach Mellor devised a plan to get Logan and Ephram together."_

"Okay," Lainey said as she and Coach Mellor entered the gym. "When Logan and Ephram arrive, you pretend to be upset with them about something and have them sit on the bleachers. I will then turn on 'Breathless' by _The Corrs_."

"Why that song?" Coach Mellor asked.

"It's the most romantic song of this decade," Lainey replied.

_"The plan went into action."_

"Okay, gentlemen," Coach Mellor said as Logan and Ephram entered the gym. "You two have a seat, we need to talk."

Logan and Ephram sat on the bleachers. As they sat, 'Breathless' began to play.

"What's going on?" Ephram asked.

"Logan," Coach Mellor said. "I think there's something you'd like to ask Ephram."

"No," Logan said.

"Yes there is," Coach Mellor said.

"No," Logan said. "There's not."

Lainey walked over to them.

"Did he ask him to the dance yet?" Lainey asked.

"What?" Ephram asked.

"Ephram," Coach Mellor said. "Logan really likes you and wants you to be his date to the dance."

Ephram looked at Logan.

"I have to go," Ephram said, running out of the gym.

Lainey and Coach Mellor looked at Logan. They could tell he was heartbroken.

"Thanks a lot!" Logan screamed before running out of the gym.

_"The next day in school, Logan and Ephram avoided each other. While that was going on, I held my first meeting in my classroom."_

"Okay, team," Jeff said. "Our first meet is in three weeks. We must start practicing now before…"

"What the hell?" a voice asked.

Jeff turned around to see C.B. standing there.

"Oh, hey," Jeff said.

"You started your own Academic Team?!" C.B. shouted.

"Yes," Jeff replied.

"You can't do that!" C.B. shouted.

"I can so do that," Jeff said. "I got it approved."

"You couldn't have sponsored another club?" C.B. asked.

"I wanted the Academic Team," Jeff said. "And since I can't have yours, I made my own."

"Good luck with just three people!" C.B. shouted.

"You're going down, Charlie Brown!" Jeff said. "This means war!"

_"By the way, never say 'This means war' in a room with three teenagers."_


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

_"I decided that C.B. and I needed to make amends. I mean we were acting like children. So I went to the teacher's lounge the very next morning."_

Jeff walked up to the table where C.B. and Lainey sat.

"C.B.," Jeff said. "I want to talk to you."

"Lainey," C.B. said. "Tell Jeff I'm not talking to him."

"He's not talking to you," Lainey said.

"You know I can hear you," Jeff said.

"Lainey," C.B. said. "Stick your tongue out at him."

Lainey stuck her tongue out at Jeff.

"I was going to apologize to you, but never mind!" Jeff shouted.

Jeff walked to his classroom to see Amber, one of his team members, standing there smiling.

"Good morning, Amber," Jeff said. "Do you need something?"

"We all thought of what you said," Amber replied. "So we put stink bombs in the other team's locker."

"You did what now?" Jeff asked.

Jeff ran into the hallway where several students stood at their lockers.

"Attention, students!" Jeff shouted. "If you are on C.B.'s Academic Team, don't open your..."

_"It was too late. A fowl stench flooded the hallway."_

"Crap!" Jeff shouted.

_ "The students on each Academic Team then began throwing eggs at each other. I couldn't believe it. I had inadvertently caused a war. And more importantly, where did they get all the eggs?"_

"Everyone stop it!" Jeff shouted before getting hit by several eggs.

Jeff then whistled loudly and everyone stopped what he or she was doing.

"Listen!" Jeff shouted. "When I said this means war, I meant we were going to beat the other team in a meet! I didn't mean for you to have a literal war!"

Jeff pointed at his team members.

"You three," Jeff said. "I'm dissolving my team."

"But, Mr. Longston," Amber said. "We really want this."

"Then join the other team," Jeff said.

Jeff walked off.

_"After going home and taking a shower, I decided to take a personal day. So I went to once again drown my sorrows in chicken wings."_

"Okay," Emily said, sitting chicken wings on the table. "Here are your chicken wings."

"Thanks, Emily," Jeff said.

"Did you start your own Academic Team?" Emily asked.

"I did," Jeff replied. "But C.B. and I got mad at each other and I may have said something about this being war."

"And then an all-out war broke out between the two teams," Emily said.

"Sure did," Jeff said. "I dissolved my team."

"I'm sorry it didn't work out," Emily said.

"It's probably for the best," Jeff said.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"_Lainey and Coach Mellor felt bad about outing Logan to Ephram. Well, technically it was Coach Mellor who outed him, but Lainey felt bad as well. They each decided split up and talk to them. Coach Mellor spoke with Logan in the gym while Lainey spoke with Ephram in her classroom."_

"I'm sorry I outed you," Coach Mellor said to Logan.

"I'm sorry we freaked you out," Lainey said to Ephram.

"It's okay," Logan said. "You were just trying to help."

"I'm sorry I freaked out," Ephram said to Lainey. "It's just, I really do like him, but I'm scared."

"He's my best friend," Logan said. "Now that he knows that I'm gay, and that I like him, he's not going to want to be my friend anymore."

"I'm scared," Ephram said. "He's my best friend. What if it doesn't work out? Our friendship would die. What if my friends don't accept the face that I'm gay?"

"A true friend won't discriminate," Lainey and Coach Mellor both said.

"_Meanwhile, I sat on the front steps of the school feeling bad for what I caused."_

C.B. walked over and sat beside Jeff.

"I heard about the Academic war," C.B. said.

"I'm sorry," Jeff said. "I've been a complete jerk. You really have wanted this for a long time. I was just selfish and only cared about what I want. I never even once thought once about what you wanted."

"I've been an immature jerk too," C.B. said. "I'm sorry. And I guess it is a little ridiculous to have 17 clubs."

"A little," Jeff agreed. "But it's your business."

Jeff and C.B. did a fist bump.

"I've been thinking," C.B. said. "I have seven member and you have three. The max is 10."

"So you're saying we can combine our teams?" Jeff asked.

"I sure am," C.B. replied.

"_And that's how C.B. and I became Academic coaches to the same team."_


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Lainey, Coach Mellor, C.B., and Jeff stood in the gym during the school dance. As they watched the students dance, Lainey looked over to see Logan sitting on the bleachers alone.

"I guess Ephram isn't coming," Lainey said. "I really thought that after the talk I had with him, he'd come and ask Logan to dance."

"I know," Coach Mellor said. "Look at Logan, he looks so heartbroken. I'm not usually this emotional, but I think I might cry."

_"Then it happened."_

Ephram walked into the gym and over to Logan.

"Hey," Ephram said. "Sorry I'm late. I had to go the long way because they're doing road work."

"You came," Logan said in a surprised tone.

"Yes," Ephram said. "Will you be my date tonight?"

Logan stood up.

"I'd be honored to be your date," Logan said.

Logan embraced Ephram and they shared a kiss.

"Now I really am going to cry," Coach Mellor said before running off.

"When did he become such a softie?" C.B. asked.

"Jeff?" a voice asked.

Jeff turned around to see Emily standing there.

"Emily," Jeff said. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm chaperoning," Emily replied. "Logan is my brother."

"Oh, wow," Jeff said.

Emily pointed at Jeff.

"This guy loves his honey wings," Emily said.

"I'm more of a barbecue fan," C.B. said.

"So, Jeff," Emily said. "Do you to dance?"

"I'd love to," Jeff replied.

'Breathless' by _The Corrs _began to play over the speakers.

"I love this song!" Emily cheered.

Jeff and Emily went onto the floor and began to dance.

_"I had only been at William Penn for two weeks and so much had happened. I was making new friends, dancing with a girl I liked, and finally had my first club."_

The next day, C.B. and Jeff began quizzing their team members after school.

_"We were hard at work practicing for the first Quiz Bowl competition."_

Jacob and Ephram sat at a diner booth smiling at each other.

_"And Jacob and Ephram were dating."_

That night, Emily walked out of the restaurant to see Jeff waiting for her.

"Ready for our first date?" Jeff asked.

Emily smiled at Jeff.


End file.
